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Nikki L., California

"Everyone thinks I have a problem. They blame me, they blame my mom. They want me to be quiet. But I'm a lesbian. I feel like I've always known it. But I didn't get into trouble `til seventh grade. I told a friend. Next thing I know, everyone seems to know. I got yelled at-on the playground, in gym, in the hall, in classes.

"Only one teacher ever did anything. Miss [Johnson], my English teacher-I love her-she made them stop it. I felt safe with her. I would go to her room for lunch and recess. She made me feel safe. She liked my poetry-encouraged me to write.

"But everywhere else was bad. I tried to defend myself. I'm little but I'm tough. When kids hit me, I hit back. I got suspended twice. Three days each. A group of boys tried to beat me up, but I kicked them. I was just defending myself, but the vice-principal thinks I have a reputation. He calls me a `hard ass.' I'm tough. I'm not gonna let anyone just push me around and hit me.

"But I got really sick of going to school. I would tell my mom I was feeling sick so I didn't have to go to school. Finally she called the school. The principal said I needed to document three incidents before they would do anything. There were about twenty to thirty kids, mostly boys, who harassed me. My grades dropped.

"Then one day I was walking home and some kids threw a brick at me. It hit me in the head. They were calling me a `fucking dyke.' I sorta lost consciousness and my head was bleeding. That did it. I decided to never go back to school. I'm too scared.

"Now I do independent study. My grades are back up. It's good. I don't have many friends. They are all a lot older than me. But that's okay-I like older people. They don't care if I am a dyke.

"I just wish they had suspended the guys who hit me. Adults don't pay attention. They should. Especially when kids act out."

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Testimonies
Dylan N., Nevada
Matt P., New Hampshire
Erin B., Georgia
Anika P., Texas
Dahlia P., Texas
Eric C., California
Wendy Weaver, Teacher, Utah
Nikki L., California
Alix M., Midwestern United States